It was also the day that I was to become a real star. Little did I know.
For several months I had been casually chatting with a handsome stranger over the interweb of mysteries and wonders. Several years my senior, and incredibly brilliant, I was always entranced by his multidimensional intellect and creative wit. But, like history had proven, anyone can hide behind a computer screen and a keyboard, so I kept my reservations at the table called, Solo.
On August 15, 2005 we decided to meet for the first time and share a drink. At the time he was a newcomer to Manhattan so I challenged him to pick a place for us to meet. (This would help me assess his taste level!) I told him, if we are feeling "it", I will have reservations ready for dinner at a special place I had always reserved in my heart for "THE ONE". But ... No pressure over cappuccino. We agreed that if we weren't feeling "IT", we would be honest and polite and continue on our marry way.
That evening, I showed up to meet my beautiful stranger. I sat across the street observing his behavior for a few minutes before revealing myself to him. It was charming how he shifted uneasily from position to position, trying to figure out which post to lean against to "look cool". As I approached him he was drenched in sweat and his pink shirt dutifully unpressed, yet perfectly unbuttoned to his heart, revealing his manly muscled chest. I quickly forgave the wrinkles.
We occupied a quiet corner in the lounge, chatting away about what you would chat on, on well ... A first date? I teased him that I never get embarrassed. He assured me, if I stuck around, he would see to it, that I could never use that line again. Whew. JUST what I was always looking for ! Towards what would seem the end of our night, I excused myself to the bathroom. I sent off a quick text to my friends telling them I would meet them out in an hour, and I casually slipped the waitress my credit card as to not make much fuss on the exit, and to thank him for a lovely time. His body language alone indicated that this was not going any further.
As I went back to the table, he clocked me on my stealthiness to pay the check, as I had beaten him to the punch. We spoke about other cool places to go to in New York and then there was a moment of dead air:
"Well, it's 7:45 and our dinner reservations are at 8:15" I said.
"I can cancel them if you'd like, or we can continue on" absolutely sure he would opt for the former.
"I'd love to" he said.
"That is ... if you would have me" treading with caution.
Immediately the mood shifted. It was official, I was not going to be the one left hanging on this date. Not going to be another casualty of the "Well that went EXACTLY as I thought it would" train I had been used to riding on.
Dinner at 'Il Bucco" was magical. Just like I always imagined it would be. We shared a bottle of wine (Coppola Claret!) and really began to reveal our true selves to each other. At the end of the night, I walked him to the subway station before I jumped in a cab uptown. It was there, on Prince and Broadway, in front of the Prada store that we kissed for the first time. I was officially hooked.
The seven years ahead were every bit as thrilling at those first few hours. He opened my heart to love and gave me a passport to the world both literally and spiritually. With every day that I wake up with him by my side, I know for a fact that whatever the day holds, challenges or cheer, it's all mute when it boils down to it, because I have the greatest blessing that God could have ever given to me.
We have been through Five different version of the iPhone, two presidential elections, the birth of our two beautiful nephews, AND witnessed the legalization of gay marriage in this great town we call home. We have been buff, we have been fat, we have been in the hospital, we have sunbathed in South America on New Years Day. We have fought about stupid shit, and neglected the important stuff. We've dealt with real life, and we have emerged stronger than ever.
As we celebrate seven years together I look back on all that I have learned. Being in a relationship is hard work. Sharing your life with someone makes you see everything that's selfish about you, how every little choice that you make effects the other. Sharing your life with someone ALSO allows you to see your own beauty and your strengths you may have never seen before. It turns the microscope on you and how you show up in your own life. As our Kabbalah teacher Karen Berg once shared with us, our success is solely dependent on turning the "ME" upside down, Making it "WE". A relationship demands it.
To the most incredible blessing God has ever bestowed upon me, My other half, My partner for life, Ted,
I am humbled to walk with you on this path called life. I pray that the Light of the Creator has in store for us, many, many, more cycles of seven. Maybe even with seven dwellings in seven different lands, with seven children enlightening us with their wisdom, with the abundance to write seven-figure checks to help make the world a better place, the wisdom to write seven different books to inspire the information age with and most importantly seven lights illuminating brightly from our soul - eternally.
Thank you for making me the star in your life,
Forever, Your boy.
